My thoughts on starting a blog
- noelleruetschi
- Dec 11, 2024
- 2 min read
Why write a blog?
For a long time, I couldn’t even talk about my own struggles. I often asked myself: Why should I share a story I felt ashamed about for years?
My reasons, though I haven’t figured it all out yet, have become clearer over time: Talking and opening up helps! I’ve learned that there is always help and hope and that staying silent and hiding everything isn't a longterm solution for sure. Yet, I was terrified to open up. I feared overwhelming people, making them sad, or, worse, putting myself into the center of attention. I didn’t want to be perceived as someone who takes themselves and their problems too important, maybe because I didn’t take my problems seriously for a long time.
For years, I felt like I wasn’t trying hard enough or that I wasn’t good enough. But here's "the truth": This is nonsense. If something matters to us, we can trust that we’re doing our best and as competitive athlete, we’re already too familiar with suffering.
What I want to achieve with this blog is to show those who have experienced similar struggles or are currently facing them that they are not alone. I spent so long believing I was, feeling misunderstood and ashamed. It wasn’t until I hit the rock bottom last spring, when I had to go to a psychiatric clinic, that I was ready to open up about my battles with depression. Before that, only a few people and some therapists knew.
But you don’t have to feel bad about sharing your struggles with someone. It doesn’t make you weak—it makes you human. We all have our difficulties.
It’s sad that many people only start opening up in therapy or a clinic when things are visibly bad. I didn’t believe it for the longest time either, but I can now say: Talking helps. Reaching out for help is one of the bravest things you can do. Even when it feels uncomfortable or weak at first - remember, as long as we breathe, there is hope.
During my hardest times, I searched for books, articles, or blogs where I could see myself reflected. I found plenty on elite sport, eating disorders, and depression, but nothing that combined all of my struggles. I felt completely lost.
Then, last August, after I decided to step away from competitive racing, I saw Leo Hayter share his story, one similar to mine. For the first time, I felt understood, less alone, and somewhat affirmed in my decision to take a break from competitive sports.
This blog is my way of doing the same: opening up about the challenges of living with a mental illness, but also sharing what has helped and continues to help me. And, above all, reminding you that life can still be amazing & beautiful.
The sun will rise again
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